The holiday season can be a beautiful time of year. With so many activities, decorations, and social gatherings, it can offer opportunities to connect with friends and family we don’t see often. It can be a time when we feel more gratitude for what we have and to share with others out of our own abundance.
It can also be a time of year when we miss those who are no longer with us in the present. The holidays can be an unwelcome reminder that we have lost loved ones or that relationships we counted on have changed in ways we did not expect. This is the experience of grief, and it is completely natural. In our fast-paced society, we tend to want to “move on” from our experiences of grief and loss and want to speed up the healing process.
Unlike physical healing in the body, emotional healing from loss can require us to return to the process of grief from time to time. Similarly, though, we can help the process along by remembering and giving our pain the attention it needs. Many of you know that I had knee surgery in October and broke my foot in August. It has been a painful few months of rest and physical therapy. At times I try to “move on” ahead of my physical abilities and am reminded to take it slowly, either by physical pain or by a friend encouraging me to slow down!
Despite wanting to rush to the end and being completely healed or “over” some loss or traumatic experience we’ve gone through, our bodies and minds need us to go “through” the process of healing. At certain times of year when we are reminded of having lost a loved one or other painful experiences, we can remind ourselves that it is important to recognize that loss and continue living our life in the present. While it isn’t helpful to try to ignore or avoid reminders of loss, neither is it beneficial to focus only on that aspect of our lives. The body and mind are incredibly powerful and can experience pain and grief while recognizing the positive aspects of our lives at the same time.
Here are some ways we can practice this during the holiday season:
* Tell someone a favorite story about your loved one
* Share a meal or coffee with someone who means a lot to you
* Give a gift, meal, or volunteer your time to someone who has a need that you can help meet
* Ask someone new about a favorite holiday tradition of theirs
* Take care of yourself by getting enough sleep, drinking water, and moving your bod
We may be reminded of loved ones who are no longer with us, but we can honor them by remembering their kindness and love and by sharing our love with others who are around us in the present. This is a huge part of what community means, and we can continue building community each time we choose to go through the challenges together and each time we find joy and reasons to celebrate together.
I am so grateful to be a part of the Bastion community, and I appreciate the kindness and care that I’ve been shown since I started working here. I hope to be present with community members here during challenging times and celebrate big when there are reasons to celebrate. And if we look closely, we can always find something good!
Here is a recipe for Healthy, No Bake Pecan Pie Bars:
https://callascleaneats.com/wprm_print/healthy-pecan-pie-bars-gluten-free-refined-sugar-free